Okay, I may have finally figured this out. Thanks to the now allowed Jeep connection.
AM General made Postal Jeeps, so that makes my AM General a very close relative. Combined with the Cummins engine, just like in a Dodge or Ram, it's really a shoe-in.
And the crowning touch. it's a 2-door. If it wouldn't win, it'd be because of pure sexism (too manly compared to a Charger).